Mum's Birthday

The intense pain from yesterday’s inflamed stitch site has eased off a little and following a day of diazepam and pain killers I got through it. Braved it out with in laws family and survived all kinds of looks and sympathies.

Today was brighter. I ventured out early and browsed shops with a friend. Still struggling to see with my good eye to be honest. But still managed to shop a little!

It’s my mums birthday today and it was lovely to have everyone to us. Very calm. A long day for the eye though and the spirit faltered too as pain and tiredness takes it’s hold. It’s a strong wave of pressure that almost pushes you down to a horizontal position where you find peace in the darkness of your eyes and mind.

There are moments in everyday when I wander what’s next- it’s so hard while the radiotherapy’s working to kill a still active and visible tumour. I do wish I couldn’t see its existence in my line of sight. Hoped it would have gone now but I understand it’s all swollen from the treatment to terminate.

There’s been some losses on the OcuMel site these past couple of days. I hope their journey was peaceful. It does raise the awareness to ‘high’ and ‘possible’. It’s like a terror attack that you hope you’ve thwarted.

Here I lay with my x4 drops done and my plastic shield taped to my face. Everyday experiences a new kind of normal I guess.