Midnight Natters

It’s been nearly a week now of learning, note making, figure compiling, medical facts and discussions with some amazing people in prep for Tuesdays interview with Piers Morgan on Good Morning Britain. I have to say I believe that Tuesday is a small warm up to the journey I intend to travel with my new OM family. All positive and forward thinking actions to create awareness and master a remedy for each of the niggles that are Ocular Melanoma. There’s SO much to take in. Least of all the fact that this is a ‘rest of life’ card.

I’m still not bitter or angry, just a little confused at times to be honest. Unsure of how I’m supposed to feel and how others close to me are feeling too. Cancer happens- that’s it. But there effect on the people around you is huge.

I’m almost, and I do mean, almost, proud to wear my Patch. The people wish they could ask why, just stare, and those that do ask why almost wish they hadn’t as like me, they’ve never heard of OM.

I had a set back with my pain levels a couple of days ago, probably due to doing too much to be honest. Dr Sagoo, my surgeon, explained about the muscle and tendon working like a pulley. I can only describe the pain in the middle of my eyebrow being similar to that of a torn Achilles! Not great in ones head for sure. So- stronger pain relief, a little nausea and we’re back on track. The double vision is still an issue and there are definitely times when I’m aware of a thumb print type splodge in peripheral view.

I do wonder how and when I will return to doing the hands on side of my job. Make-up artistry involves bright lights and close up work. ‘One day at a time, Jo, one day.’

Maybe my path will change, in fact I know it will in many ways, but maybe there is a reason why ‘I’ have this. I was planning on embarking on my Yoga teacher training course to be able to help and guide others in their chosen paths. At the moment with only one eye clearly focusing and the other full of stitches and things ending in ‘...oma’ standing on my head is not on my list! Maybe instead I can help those who have found themselves on a path they never intended to go down. Side by side and hand in hand we will see eye to eye together.